Why I’ve Come To Hate The Cry It Out Method

Before I even start, I need to say this…If the cry it out method works for you and your family, that’s great! I do not mean to say that you are a bad parent or that you’re harming your child or anything like that. I’m a firm believer in doing what works best for your situation, and if cry it out is something your baby responds well to, then more power to you! This is just my experience and my take on it for MY family. I am not intending to judge anyone here at all because I don’t live with your babies.

Cry it out (CIO) is one of the oldest methods in the book. Everyone and their brother has used it, swears by it, or hates it. There are very few people who are in the middle; either you hate it or you love it. I’m one of those people that hates it. Mostly because it doesn’t work for my child and yet people still insist on telling me that I need to do with him. These are just a few of the reasons why I want to slap someone every time they say, “Just let him cry.” I've recently been using a method called, "Fuss it out." I find that this works a lot better than the full blown "Cry it out" method. Here's why I prefer FIO over CIO...

1. There is nothing “soothing” about this method. Everyone says it teaches self soothing and it’s good for them. There is NOTHING soothing about a baby screaming for hours on end in the middle of the night.

2. My kid vomits when he cries for more than five minutes. I refuse to make myself have to clean up vomit AND deal with a crying baby at two in the morning.

3. He sleeps three feet away from me. I cannot physically handle listening to him cry for more than a few minutes when he’s that close. I might as well just sit next to his crib and hand him a mega phone to cry into.

4. I know plenty of 18 month olds that still cry every night for hours on end. Obviously this method isn’t working for your child either.

5. I feel like ignoring him is not something I want to do when he’s so young. He has his whole life to learn that people suck, I don’t want to teach him that at 6 months old.

6. He gets more worked up. If I let him cry for a few minutes and then go to him, he’s fine and falls back asleep in a few minutes. When he goes more than a few minutes he gets super pissed and it can take an hour or more to calm him back down.

7. It’s learned helplessness. I just don’t like that, plain and simple.

8. I hate the term “sleep training.” He is my child, not my golden retriever.

9. It gets him all hot and bothered. Literally. He gets really hot when he cries for too long. So now, I have a hot, vomit covered, angry, worked up baby on my hands.

10. It makes me leak. If he cries for more than a few minutes and it’s that really distressed cry I leak all over myself. My boobs just can’t handle it.

When I say “cry” I don’t mean just whimpering and settling down kind of cry, I’m talking about the full-fledged freak out kind of crying.  If he’s just kind of whimpering, I have no problem leaving him there to settle himself down.. Hell, letting him whimper and fuss for a few minutes is the only way he will fall asleep on his own. It’s when it’s that major “I’m going to make your life a living hell if you don’t give me my damn pacifier” kind of crying kicks in that I can’t just leave him there. Maybe one day I’ll be able to cave and do it, but I doubt it.